Chicago, IL. (Jun 30) - Chicago White Sox first baseman Paul Konerko, struggling all season to keep his batting average above .200, announced that he's trying a new tactic.
"Whenever I'm told to swing, I'll swing," Konerko told reporters gathered around the batting cage prior to yesterday's interleague game against the crosstown Cubs. "That includes infielders who are making some chatter, and any fans who I can pick up chanting in the stands."
Konerko referred specifically to the age-old mantra of "Hey batter, batter, batter, batter -- SWING!" and said that he's willing to take that advice now.
"I've tried just about everything else," said the 32-year-old Konerko, currently batting .215 and set to return from the disabled list this week. "I've tried hypnotism, smearing hot peppers on my socks, and kissing a photo of Jessica Alba," Konerko said. "All without any real success.
"What's the worst that could happen"," he reasoned.
Konerko said he got the idea from watching a rerun of the movie Ferris Bueller's Day Off, which includes a scene with Ferris's friend Cameron shouting the mantra at a Cubs game.
"Then it hit me: does anyone ever really swing when that's said?," Konerko asked reporters. "When I was in Little League, no one ever did. I think it's about time someone did. And that someone is going to be me."
Konerko then took batting practice, but not before rubbing teammate AJ Pierzynski's head and licking his ear, explaining the odd behavior as another way of breaking out of his slump -- something that Pierzynski said was news to him.
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